


Marvel and DC (no v)

by OneSmartChicken



Series: The Scrap Yard [1]
Category: DCU, Marvel, Teen Titans (Animated Series)
Genre: ALL THE CRACK, Crack Crossover, Crack Fic, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Gen, Humor, fluffy fluff fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-08
Updated: 2017-10-08
Packaged: 2019-01-10 12:58:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12299709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OneSmartChicken/pseuds/OneSmartChicken
Summary: There's two universes, DC and Marvel--and they're big fans.





	Marvel and DC (no v)

**Author's Note:**

> So this is a little old, and pretty much unedited etc. Written during nostalgia for the Teen Titans show, right after watching (and crying over) the Judas Contract movie thinking about that one quote thing about Captain America, Batman, and rain. Kicking off a "series" out of my scrap file. It'll be no particular fandoms, just whatever, as ya do.

Steve scowled, slogging through a veritable flood (okay, flood was dramatic, but not by that much) clutching the remains of a newspaper. His phone was lucky to be Tony Stark approved or else it would have bit the, well, raindrop long ago, and despite Tony's assurances of its _invincibility_ (his word, not Steve's) Steve didn't dare take the dang thing out and call a cab. Or hell, one of Stark Inc's company cars. Or SHIELD. A random teammate.

  
It was raining cats and dogs out here, borderline literally, it was _hailing_ , and for the life of him, Steve couldn't find a single place selling _gosh darn umbrellas._  
_Those assholes._

 

It was raining! It was New York! In any sensible world, there'd be someone hawking umbrellas on every corner, like newsies back in the day. It was just good business sense. Or at the very least a nice little stand in the corner of various stores that really just ought to be selling umbrellas anyway. But the only places that he'd thought might have umbrellas, they'd had them far off from the doors and registers, and he couldn't in good conscience go trudging through some random store, getting street muck and sleet and rain and whatnot all over a store just to come back out and continue smucking along.

  
He blamed that damn comic line. Apparently everyone thought he and the dark knight were quite similar, which Steve didn't really agree with but found largely flattering. But of course people compared them, even though one was fictional and the other was a national icon, and even when they viewed him favorably, which wasn't always, it wasn't necessarily a...pleasant experience.

  
Like now he couldn't help thinking about umbrellas, when previously he'd have happily tromped through all the way home! Or, well, not happily. He'd no doubt have cursed and muttered and grumbled and generally begrudged the entire day, but now he felt like he was somehow failing as himself for not having an umbrella. It was ridiculous! He needed to stop reading those comics.

  
...well, maybe at least avoid the fanbase. He sighed. Darn interesting books.

 

...

 

Bruce "yes that Bruce, don't you recognize my cheekbones" Wayne snapped the magazine closed. He glowered at it, one of those glowers that made Dick roll his eyes nowadays (that punk). He gave it a little flap.

  
"I wear a hood!" he hissed at the magazine. "With a cape! And _I'm Batman._ I have literally dozens of umbrellas! What do they expect me to do, add a pocket to the suit?" He rolled up the magazine.  
Dammit.

  
Now he needed to order another umbrella.  
Maybe he'd start a line of Batman rain gear. That'd...do nothing.

  
Dammit. It was such bull shit when he couldn't just throw money at a problem and make it go away. Some days he really sympathized with the plight of Iron Man.  
He binned the magazine. It was just a stupid rag anyway.  


...

 

Tony would never admit it (unless provoked, he admitted a lot of stupid shit when provoked, it was a problem, he wasn't working on it) but he loved trying to copy Starfire moves.

  
It sounded stupid! Mostly because it was. He couldn't shoot lasers out of his eyes. Or repulsors. And he'd given that a good college try more than once. And no he couldn't make the repulsive blasts anything other than their iconic white-blue. And a whole list of other Starfire things, really. But it always got his blood pumping to _try_. He'd jet around, strike that classic knee-up, hands-braced pose (which the repulsors weren't great for), he made a suit with special "detail repulsors" that he could control the blast radius of, even though it took far too much concentration for actual combat use...

  
Starfire was cool dammit!

  
And if he occasionally bounced around his room or lab quoting her, doing stances and steps...well that was between him and his bots and everyone else could eat it.  


...

 

"But the Black Widow is so dreamy!" Starfire insisted, trailing after her friend, absolutely dogged about the subject.

  
"She's kinda dark," Terra said, which wasn't really agreement or disagreement so much as _hopeless deflection._ They'd been having this discussion for _three weeks._

  
Terra didn't even dislike Black Widow! Hell, she liked the character! A badass chick who was all murder and curves? Sign her up!

  
She'd just seen Starfire reading one of the comics and mentioned it didn't really suit her image. Because it didn't. Because she was _Starfire._ And somehow that turned into the alien trailing around after her extolling the virtues of her beloved Widow and it had gone from "kinda cute," to "bit weird," to "deeply unsettling," to "I think you should talk to someone (not me) about this," to "for fuck's sake please kill me." Three weeks was a long time to be regularly bombarded with _any_ subject, let alone Starfire's deep-seated crush on the fictional ex-KGB agent.

  
And Terra could not stress that enough: _fictional. Black Widow was not real._ Terra was not hurting her feelings. Or insulting Starfire. Or whatever. It was one comment! One!

  
"Look at her magnificent form in this kick! Is she not magnificent?" Starfire pestered, shoving the book in Terra's face.

  
"Oh Jesus Christ," Terra muttered and decided three weeks was the fucking limit. "Raven!" she bellowed. She could hear Raven mutter a curse from six floors away. Whatever, Terra was passing the baton.

  
"But Terra!" Starfire cried in what Terra was starting to think was Starfire being _an absolute troll._ If only she could keep up that conviction in the face of Starfire's sad eyes. Those should be illegal.

  
Raven's shadow burst out of the floor, wings spreading briefly before taking a more humanish look.

  
"Starfire," the shadow said flatly. Terra made her escape.

**Author's Note:**

> I've recently started wandering into comics so I might write more here, but I'm mostly reading indie-ish stuff (please scream about Alters with me) so -hand wobble-
> 
> I'm so sad there's not a lot in the way of recent Starfire comic she's my favorite dammit. Rec me some comics that aren't "gritty" if you feel like it, hope you had fun. Etc. <3
> 
>  
> 
> (...FOR THE RECORD there's a lot of fics due for new chapters. I'm working on literally all of them. Plus others because of course I am.)


End file.
